Baguettes, Bonjours and Bothers: Unexpected Joys of Living in France

Moving to France has been a journey filled with surprised and challenges, even though we had thought about it for years before we moved. Our first two years in this beautiful country have been a blend of enchantment, fascination, and occasional frustration. It’s been enriching, mentally stimulating, and at times, completely exhausting. While there are numerous things we might approach differently now, these lessons have been invaluable.

Even with much of what we thought we knew, our journey to France unfolds in ways we never imagined. Just as there is a long list of things that we might approach differently now, I am not sure we would have known at the time. We’ve learned a lot.

Adapting to the French Way of Life: You Will Slow Down

One part of moving to another country is not just relocating, but arriving where you are. That takes time.

Getting our first visa was fast and easy—the French consulate in Washington DC had our approvals and our passports back to us within a week. When we arrived in France with our luggage, the customs agent who checked our passport did it without comment. We got checked when we arrived off the plane and just like that, we had moved to France. Settling into life here has taken some time.

We first arrived in Nantes and rented a car at the airport, which I wouldn’t recommend. France is awash in tourists and if you’re entering the tourist experience, you’re often going to have a less pleasant time of it. I’ve been in a few different situations that were like that—beautiful places and nice events, but so ready for tourism that any charm was a bit hard to enjoy. But those experiences are rare enough for us that we forget about them.

France still has a tremendous amount to enjoy, though it demands that you do it at a French pace, which is not only slower but has a different rhythm entirely. In the neighborhood we live in now, I am still surprised to see parks and courtyards packed with people at times that I might not normally go to them. Our local bistros, almost all of them, are closed on the weekends. If we want to go out, we need to go more to the center of town. In the middle of August, for example, it’s as if the entire country has closed down.

It's not just a slower pace of life, but a very different pace of life. Or at least the timing of things is quite different. You are not expected to be working all the time. In fact, if you are, it’s a little weird.

In the US, our days were often consumed by work and endless to-do lists. Here, people stop. You don’t rush meals; in fact, meals and connecting with people are a genuine part of the way people do business here. Lunch is a set time, a set behavior, and you’re expected to stop, eat, and be social.

Building Connections: Social Circles and Community Involvement

There is a time and a place for most things in this country. Coming from New York, which operates from a 24/7 mentality, it takes a lot of getting used to. On one level, it’s frustrating, but on another, it’s just a thing to get used to. There is something quite relaxing about not being able to shop on a Sunday afternoon, for example. If you don’t have it, you don’t have it. Life goes on.

We’ve wound up at small village parties over the years as odd little seasonal festivals pop up, from chestnut festivals in Bretagne to endless cider offerings, to a random festioval we drove past in the country that we thought was going to be a far-right rally but turned out to be a box car race through vineyards with music and bands.

Meeting people remains tricky, but folks are open, despite our questionable French. We study, but it always feels like we’re mispronouncing something. Forming a new social circle has been both challenging and rewarding. We've met fellow expats who share our journey, as well as locals who have welcomed us. Participating in local activities, from wine tastings to language exchange meetups, has helped us forge meaningful connections.

It really depends on what you’re looking for.

I like to think that I’m a good cook. While French cuisine is renowned worldwide, I do find it can be bland and living here has given us the chance to dive deep into its diverse flavors. We've started frequenting local markets, where the array of fresh produce, cheeses, and meats is impressive.

I am personally more interested in the diversity of modern France, not just traditional ideas about food, but what that is like in the country today. France and the francophone world is a vast diaspora with many cultures finding a home here.

France, with all its quirks and beauty, is home for now.

In my next post, we'll delve into some practical aspects of living in France: navigating the healthcare system, dealing with bureaucracy, and tips for making the most of your expat experience. Stay tuned and join us as we continue to find home elsewhere.